What Happens When You Fart In Front Of Your Wife, According To Science

Why do we fart? Though occasionally funny, farts are gross, yet ultimately an inevitable part of family life. Although farting might seem uncouth, the scientific consensus is that farts are nothing to worry over. Couples should neither shy away from nor feel ashamed of passing gas in front of each other. In fact, what happens when you hold in a fart is just as stinky as trapped intestinal gas can be reabsorbed into the bloodstream only to reemerge as bad breath.

At the end of the day, farts are sometimes just the GI system’s way of saying “I love you” — and everyone benefits from backing off and letting nature take its course. But is farting good for you? Here’s what you need to know about farts and your health.

Holding in Farts Will Give You Bad Breath

Although holding in farts won’t send you to the emergency room, it might be the reason why your conversations are briefly cut short. When people hold in their farts, the gas absorbs into the body and is released through the mouth in the form of terrible breath, researchers warn. Depending on how offensive bad breath is compared to the occasional discrete toot, farting may be the lesser of two evil odors. Farting is definitely not a replacement for dental hygiene or even mint gum, but maintaining that minty fresh breath may be one good excuse to not hold farts in.

Farts Tell Your Spouse That You’re Healthy

Is farting good for you? Yes. Farts may not be a sign of good manners, but they are a symptom of good gut bacteria and a healthy diet. If a person is not farting, it means they’re eating nothing but refined sugars. In many ways, farting is just your butt’s way of saying that you’ve been eating your vegetables. Your spouse might not love the sound or smell as much as they love having a healthy partner, but it’s all a fart of the same package.

Farts Are Funny

People who think farts are funny may not be the most mature, but they’re not alone either. Farts satisfy three different philosophical theories that help to explain why some things are funnier than others, one study found. Superiority theory suggests that humor is rooted in dominance (and occasionally aggression) and that there’s nothing more aggressive than letting one rip. Incongruity theory states that things are funny when they’re inappropriate, which farts definitely are. And finally, relief theory explains that people laugh to relieve tension, and there’s no better release than, well, a fart. So if your partner isn’t laughing, science says they should be.

Smelling a Fart Is Neither Good nor Bad for Your Health

A few years back, a study claiming that smelling people’s farts were healthy made the rounds. This is not quite the case. The study actually found that the chemical compound AP39 is good for cells, and it’s linked to the hydrogen sulfide that makes farts smell bad. So, there’s no evidence that getting a whiff of a fart is good for your health. But even if smelling farts isn’t healthy, it’s certainly not unhealthy.

Her Farts Smell Worse

According to gastroenterologist Michael D. Levitt, who’s published over 275 papers on flatulence, women’s farts smell worse than men’s because their farts have a higher concentration of hydrogen sulfide. When you fart in front of your wife, don’t point out how much worse hers are, but think of it as an opportunity to take the blame for her silent but deadly rip. It’s a more chivalrous way of saying that you’ve also been eating very healthy. Ultimately, love is what farts are made of.