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Would Any Father Refer to Their Son the Way Trump Referred to Barron?

Do we think Donald Trump isn't Barron's actual father? Do normal dads talk about their kids that way?

by Ryan Britt
GETTY

John Lennon referred to his son Sean Lennon as a “Beautiful Boy” in the excellent song of the same name. For many of us, children are what happens when we’re busy making other plans; but what about Donald Trump? President Donald Trump certainly makes a lot of plans — many of which anger parents — but why did he refer to his “beautiful” son Barron in such a bizarre way? In other words, why would any father refer to his son the way Trump referred to Barron?

In a September 2019 press conference about the dangers of vape companies and e-cigarette brands targeting teens, Trump said: “We can’t have our youth be so affected, and I’m hearing it, and that’s how the First Lady got involved. She’s got a son, together, that’s a beautiful young man, and she feels very, very strongly about it.”

Okay, so props for calling Barron a “beautiful young man.” Way to channel some John Lennon vibes. Let’s all sit with that for a second.

But wait. What the hell is going on with the rest of this? Trump is famous for bizarre statements, but this one seems to take the prize for most detached. It’s like a robot who doesn’t speak English was required to translate for an English-speaking toddler. If I were to start talking like Trump, relative to my daughter, here’s the kind of stuff I would be saying.

“My wife has a beautiful daughter.”

“We took a girl to daycare today. My wife’s beautiful daughter. She’s very happy about it.”

“The day my wife’s daughter was born was the happiest day of my life. I really liked it.”

You get the point. Dads generally don’t refer to their biological children as their wife’s children. That’s usually something you’d say to indicate the child is not yours. One could argue it’s not inaccurate per se, presumably Barron is Melania Trump’s son, but still. Pretty freaking weird.

Most of the rest of the world noticed the gaff too. Here are some of the best reactions.

Late-night hosts were quick to capitalize on the gaffe, with Trevor Noah and Stephen Colbert telling some of the best jokes.

Noah also said that Trump was basically a worse father than Darth Vader, but, pointed out at least Darth Vader admitted to having a son. If Trump was Vader, Noah said Trump would have said: “Luke, she is your mother.”

Colbert’s dig was simple but effective, zeroing in on Trump’s use of the word “together” Colbert said: “Nice save, buddy.”

But the rest of the internet had some pretty great reactions, too. At least one parody account perfectly summed-up what this sounds like to human ears.

But really, the person we should feel bad for here is clearly Barron.