Christmas Songs

The Best Funny Christmas Songs For Kids

Christmas music is great. Funny Christmas music is better. But which versions can help parents from losing their minds?

by Ryan Britt
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OSAKA, JAPAN:  Sesame Street characters (L-R) Elmo, Zoe and Cookie Monster dance on the stage for it...
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What are the best and silliest, funny Christmas songs for kids? You probably can hum a few off the top of your head, but let’s face it, not everything can be “Rudolph the Rednose Reindeer.” And, even if we are talking about funny Christmas songs for kids, what are the best versions of those songs that don’t make parents want to die?

The holidays are great with our little ones, and singing with your kids is fantastic. But, that doesn’t mean you can’t be a little selective about which Christmas songs you select as the playlist for what your kids listen to. Below are some curated funny Christmas songs for kids, with a special focus on keeping parents sane. To that end, there is only one track by Alvin and the Chipmunks below. (Though we’ve offset it with a Paul McCartney track.) Enjoy!

Kasey Musgraves: “I Want a Hippopotamus For Christmas”

My daughter will only listen to the Kasey Musgraves version of this song. All other versions of this song do not exist for her. I kind of get it. I’m happy I live in a world where my 3-year-old has Kasey Musgraves!

“You’re a Mean One, Mr. Grinch”

In my experience, children like songs in which someone can be told they are bad or doing something wrong. Let’s call this the “Monkeys jumping on the bed” effect. Why do kids like that song? Answer: Because they can tell the monkeys not to jump on the bed and feel morally superior to said monkeys. Grouch-shaming the Grinch in this song is the same thing, only way better because it’s also about Christmas. Not sure why, but my kid has never been afraid of the Grinch. She just thinks he’s silly.

“All I Want For Christmas Is My Two Front Teeth”

I’m not sure which version of this song is ideal, but Elmo? Sure. I guess. Perhaps this song could encourage children to want non-material things for Christmas. It’s an unproven theory so let’s test it, shall we?

Alvin and the Chipmunks: “Up on the House-Top”

I used to hate the Chipmunk’s versions of songs. Then I had a toddler. Now I love the stupid joy they spread. And this Christmas song by Alvin and the Chipmunks is one that has made the cut. This is fine. I can live with this.

Jimmy Durante: “Frosty the Snowman”

This funny Christmas song does not originate with Jimmy Durante, but his deeply weird delivery of it in the famous 1969 short “movie,” is kind of the only way to go. I think kids like this version (or at least my daughter does) because it sounds like a weird dad trying to make this song cool and failing.

Paul McCartney: “Wonderful Christmas Time”

Though I’ve long argued the obvious fact that Ringo is the Beatle children love the most, find me a child that won’t respond to Paul McCartney’s voice. It’s pretty much impossible. Paul is fantastic because he’s a cozy dad to his bones and this song is a Christmas classic that you can’t help but love, even if it’s cheesy as hell.

Raffi: “Must Be Santa”

Most smart parents are pro Raffi, and most of his Christmas songs are solid. One of his earworms that I don’t actually mind getting in my skull is “Must Be Santa” I mean, if you must, you can track down the Bob Dylan version of this, but I really recommend you do not.

Muppets Christmas Carol: “It Feels Like Christmas”

Not all young children love seeing the Muppets, but I would argue that all children love the way the muppets sound. And, if you’re like me, and you believe that Michael Caine’s Scrooge is the best version of the character, then this song will bring you good memories and good cheer. Humbug!

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