Kelly Gonsalves

Kelly Gonsalves is a multi-certified sex educator and relationship coach helping people figure out how to make their dating lives actually feel good—more open, more optimistic, and more pleasurable. She received her bachelor’s degree in journalism from Northwestern University and went on to receive sex and relationship educator certifications from The Gottman Institute, Planned Parenthood, and Everyone Deserves Sex Ed. Her writings on sexuality, relationships, identity, and the body have appeared in Cosmopolitan, Teen Vogue, The Cut, mindbodygreen, and elsewhere. You can say hi on Instagram @kellyagonsalves and stay in the loop about her latest programs, gatherings, and other projects through her site and newsletter. Right now she’s probably snuggled up with her bullet journal somewhere or dissecting old seasons of The Bachelor though, in case you were wondering.

Relationships

16 Clear Signs You’re Falling Out Of Love

By Kelly Gonsalves

We hear it all the time, but what does it actually look like?

Life

How To Be A Better Lover

By Kelly Gonsalves

This is what it takes to truly connect with your partner.

Show Me Love

15 Ways To Be A Little Bit More Affectionate

By Kelly Gonsalves

A little bit of affection goes a long way.

Sex

How to Figure Out Exactly What Turns Your Partner On

By Kelly Gonsalves

There are four broad categories of turn-ons, according to research.

Love

The One Question That Can Change All Your Fights For The Better

By Kelly Gonsalves

Ask it and you’ll find it’s a lot easier to avoid escalation and find resolution.

Talking Shop

6 Big Signs You're A Bad Communicator

By Kelly Gonsalves

Criticizing. Shouting. Shutting down. Here are some telltale patterns to understand — and how to course-correct in the moment.

Advice

8 Common Sex Mistakes That Are Hurting Your Sex Life

By Kelly Gonsalves

#4 Following a script.

Viewing Party

How To Suggest Watching Porn With Your Partner

By Kelly Gonsalves

Here’s how to bring up the subject — and a few best practices to keep in mind if you decide to watch some together.

Pleasure

Everything to Know About the “Male G-Spot”

By Kelly Gonsalves

Consider this your crash course for the pleasure center.

Sex

52 Dirty Would You Rather Questions to Help Heat Things Up

By Kelly Gonsalves

Ask them on your next date night or whenever the mood feels right.

Sex

7 Fun Sex Positions You Should Try At Least Once

By Kelly Gonsalves

For those times when you’re feeling a little adventurous.

Sex

How To Talk To Your Partner About Having More Sex

By Kelly Gonsalves

This is what the discussion should look like.

Sex

11 Ways To Mix It Up With Foreplay

By Kelly Gonsalves

The first step is to rethink the definition of "foreplay" altogether.

Sex

So, Sex Has Become A Reward in Your Relationship. Is That A Problem?

By Kelly Gonsalves

While the arrangement can add some fun incentives to a relationship, there are certainly some things to keep in mind.

Self Assessment

9 Big Signs Of A Satisfying Sex Life

By Kelly Gonsalves

No, there isn’t one definition of “satisfying sex”. But there are some benchmarks to know.

Sex

6 Fun Sex Resolutions To Make This Year

By Kelly Gonsalves

Because why not resolve to make your sex life a bit more interesting?

Sex

6 Ways To Help Your Partner Feel More Confident In Bed

By Kelly Gonsalves

Here are a few ways to support your partner’s confidence in and out of the bedroom.

Life

How to Ask For What You Want in Bed (Without Making It Awkward)

By Kelly Gonsalves

Your partner isn’t a mind reader, and neither are you. To know how to turn each other’s gears just right, you’ll need to give each other the user manual.